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PJ London's avatar

As a fairly young man, I was tasked with writing a program that would take all the figures from a "works and cost accountant" who analysed and apportioned every single cost of a department chain with 194 stores, 9 warehouses and multiple administration centres and apply them to individual departments within the stores. Then to take the departmental sales of those stores, calculate the gross profits from sales and cost of goods, then apply the apportioned costs to each department in each store, calculate a net profit and sum all the stores to arrive at a net profit for each department.

The 'model' had some 4.5 million elements and was an absolute work of art.

This was presented to the board and it showed that the Grocery department, which accounted for 34% of the total sales was in fact making a loss.

The Marketing director for Groceries took one look at the results, said "Bullshit" and that was the end of the discussion.

My wonderful model sank into obscurity never to be seen, heard of or referenced again.

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ScuzzaMan's avatar

I suppose if we start paying people for empirical evidence rather than digital fantasy simulations, we'll probably get more of the former and less of the latter. If we also start to impose negative sanctions for the production of the latter it will probably reduce even further.

(Edited due to atrocious spelling. Sorry.)

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